Monday, September 18, 2017

Wake Up Call

What drove us on in this thing we called life is actually the hope that things will get better. This shiny, sparkly illusion we call 'the future' or even 'tomorrow'. Things will eventually be better, just stick it through, things will get better, you'll see. Lies? Is it just things getting better, or it's just we are used to it already. Are we getting better? Or is it just something else to be focused on?

You know often times I hate myself for being so self-aware, for being overly analytic and critical for not loving myself but I keep forgetting the fact that I can't turn back and if I truly want to practice self-love I should stop fighting and start being. Accepting. Accepting that this is already a part of me. Accepting that I have this habit and it's ok. Accepting that I am enough and be enough. Accepting that I am the way I am and being truly ok with that. Accepting that yes I do have panic attacks sometimes and have negative thoughts sometimes but I can handle it I can face it this is all me and not me at the same time. Accepting that things will eventually change. I wish with all my might that things will get better. I wish with all my might that you're the one. But one step at a time baby. I think I sort of get what you mean now.

What we can do now is really love and trust. What if we let go this perfect illusion of love and work with what we have now.

I will not be you.

Be enough, and only be better. Screw self-righteousness.

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